Sharpen the Weight Loss Edge Once Again

It has been a while since I posted to this blog. My last post was about my eating experience during my husband's health crisis.  I was able to walk through that difficult time without the stress induced overeating that has been characteristic of my life.  I am so thankful that I was able to emerge from that challenging experience maintaining my conscious eating dietary style.

Since that time, however, I lost some of my edge.  I have not gained weight, but I haven't lost any either.  I've stalled out at a certain weight and been there for about three months. 

I've been thinking about why this may be and decided on one main reason.

Instead of 'eating only till I was full', I began putting on my plate the amount of food I thought I would need to eat.  Then I would continue to eat till it was gone, letting that be my signal for ending my meal rather than the 'full feeling' signal that has been my guide for several months.

I lost sight of the main reason for my success with losing weight thus far.  I took my eyes off the key requirement to conscious eating - paying attention to the full feeling that comes when I eat and letting that be my cue, my signal for ending my meal. 

So I have resolved once again to 'sharpen my edge', and get back into the weight loss battle. One snack, one meal, one day at a time.

One and Two

As I mentioned in my last post, in my opinion there are two essential parts to being successful with conscious eating, or 'eating the way slender people eat'.  Those of us who are trying to eat consciously must consciously be aware of both parts at every meal and every snack.  Here goes:

1. Eating consciously means eating only until you are full.  I have had friends say to me, "But I don't always know when I'm full."  I understand that statement and most of my life have lived by the "I'm eating till my plate is empty" model, because I don't recognize this full feeling. 
     The truth is that our bodies will give us a signal for when enough food has been eaten during a meal.  In order to eat only until we are full, we must learn to recognize and acknowledge that signal no matter how much delicious food is still on our plate.  We must be willing to admit that it's there, even when we want to ignore the signal. 

2. Again, eating consciously requires that once you feel the signal for fullness that your body gives you, eating must stop.  In my opinion this is the hardest part, because sometimes we just don't want to stop.  Oh, man. There's still baked potato with all the trimmings on my plate. There's only half a slice of garlic toast left; surely I can eat that. That won't be much. In order to do this with integrity, you must stop eating once you feel that full signal.  If the food left on your plate can't be saved for whatever reason, it goes in the trash.  That's hard if you were raised with the starving children in China, as I was.  However, no matter what, conscious eating is not conscious eating, and you will never be slender, unless you are willing to throw good food in the trash.  It is a difficult, but critical lesson to learn.

Yes. This is hard.  But you know, so is living with knee problems, diabetes, back issues, heart problems, and a myriad of other health issues that are caused by being overweight.  Those of us who live our lives with too much girth can give you a list of ways that said girth has affected the way we live.  We choose our challenges. We choose our rewards.  Let's choose wisely. 

Next Challenge

2. My cooking style needs to change.  I have always cooked family sized meals.  Before my children were born, While they were growing up at home. After they left home and its just my husband and I.  I have always cooked family sized meals.  Then we were would have leftovers for another meal or two.  Well, now with me eating much less than I have previously done, these leftovers are being 'left over' for more than a couple of meals, and we are eventually throwing them away.  Since I am so 'old school' about the starving children in China, and since I hate wasting food that costs so much, throwing away food is very difficult for me.  Therefore, something must change.  Either I must start cooking smaller meals, or get used to tossing leftovers in the trash.  That's my choice, because I'm not going to start eating more so that I can save those starving children or not waste money.  Nope. That's not going to happen.  Most likely I will begin do both things: cook smaller meals, and get used to throwing away leftovers. Problem solved!

Darn That Facebook

They look soooooo good. Eye candy. You know what I mean. I'm referring to those delicious looking recipes that uninvitedly appear on our Facebook feeds. Many are loaded with cheese, sugar, heavy cream, etc. There are also many nutritious recipes also. However, the ones that quickly catch my eye are recipes such as 'Red Velvet Cheesecake'. Oh yea. Delicious.

I love to cook for family and friends. I love to cook foods that are rich and sweet. The problem is that it is vertually impossible for me to cook those types of dishes and not partake in their rich goodness, which can completely blow my diet and make my diabetes worse.

Therefore in order to keep my diet headed the right direction, I must find satisfaction in cooking dishes that are not going to be a diet buster for my. Perhaps it's time for me to put myself first in this aspect of my life.

Slippery People

This is the second part of my thoughts on an Alcoholic Anonymous teaching about avoiding Slippery Places, Slippery People, and Slippery Things.

Something that is slippery is different from something that is slick. If you pick up something that is slick or step on something that is slick, you are almost certain to drop it or fall. If you know that it is slick ahead of time, you will probably find a different way of accomplishing your task rather than picking it up or stepping on it.

If you pick up something that is slippery, or step on something that is slippery, there is a chance that you might drop it or fall, but it is not inevitable, if you are cautious. Therefore, if you know ahead of time it is slippery, you might go ahead and carefully do it. That is why slippery is more dangerous that slick.

For a recovering compulsive overeater, slippery people are dangerous. They are your friends. They are fun. They are probably obese. They love to eat and they always have food around. They love you and they love it when you eat with them. Right? Inwardly they will be jealous of you for finally gaining control over your 'addiction lion' called food and they will even admire your strength and 'will power'. However, because of their jealousy, they may try to subtly tempt you into returning to your old ways. They may not do it on purpose, but trust me, they will be glad (even if they don't say so) when you once again join their happy, but miserable overeating clan.

Oh, yes, your addiction may be enough under control that you can be around these people and not overeat. For a while. But little by little, bite, by bite, you will slip, yes, slip back into your old ways. It is almost unavoidable. I am not being pessimistic or negative. I am being realistic.

So what do you do? You can find new friends and never, ever see your old eating buddies again. That is only partially realistic. What if the slippery people in your life are your family? Totally avoid them? Not possible.

I don't think it is realistic to completely change our circle of friends and certainly our family. You just do your best to avoid situations where there are the types of food that will tempt you to overeat. Again. do your best. Personally, it was helpful for me to bring food to family gatherings that I can eat. Taking care of your dietary needs yourself, will give ensure there is food present you can safely eat.

Being aware of the 'slippery' situation you are in, will make you more cautious about you eat. You must have your 'lion' on a short leash and tightly held.

Another Alcoholic Anonymous teaching is about taking one day at a time. I may not be able to do something for the rest of my life, but just for today, I can do it. Remembering back to my Overeaters Anonymous days, there were times when my prayer was not for the day. Instead it was, "Lord, help me make it though this meal." "Lord, help me make it to the next meal." "Lord, help me make it through this church dinner."

Yes, fighting a food addiction is hard, very hard, but God's grace is sufficient, not only for one day at a time, but for one meal at a time.