A month or so ago I wrote about a teaching in Alcoholics Anonymous which advises us (compulsive people) to avoid slippery people, slippery places, and slippery things which can and will slowly, but surely cause us to slide right 'off the wagon' and back to the dessert table every time.
I have been spending a lot of time with my grandmother the last six weeks because she has been very ill. At the moment I am staying with her for a few days, working to get her reestablished at home so that she can once again live alone with the help of a daytime caretaker. My vocabulary is not large or colorful enough to adequately share with you what a wonderful person she is and how much I love her.
I do have a problem, however, when I visit her at her home for an extended period of time. She is indeed, a slippery person in my life. When I am with her, my controlled path of healthy eating slowly gives way, one bite at a time, to consuming or desiring to consume foods that are 'illegal'. It is not that she encourages me to eat 'all the wrong things'. She doesn't even come close to doing that. I think it would take a therapist's skill to peal back all the emotional layers in my life and clarify why my grandmother affects my dietary control that way.
My plans are to leave in a three more days if all goes well with her. Can I stay in complete control this entire time? Truthfully. Most likely not. However, I know that this 'side trip' is temporary and my own home is not a 'slippery place'. So until then, I will do my best to not completely lose control, taking it one snack, one meal, one day at a time.
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