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Sunday, December 30, 2007

Six Flags and the Superman Tower of Power

Yes, it was a fun day. I hadn't been to Six Flags in 15 years, and I wanted to ride everything. Well, I didn't ride everything, what I did ride was fun. I had never ridden the Superman ride before, partially because I didn't want to stand in long lines and partially because I was just a wimp.

Today, Lisa and I got in line (which was short) and on the ride before I had a chance to really think about it. It was great!!! I loved it. I love it when I step out of my comfort zone and accomplish something new.

This morning Lisa made Smoothies for breakfast. She has a Magic Bullet blender which she uses for many many things, but this morning it was for banana-strawberry smoothies made with bananas, frozen strawberries, and Silk (soy milk). They tasted wonderful and very filling.

OK. So I won't say what I ate at Six Flags, but it was the best hamburger I had eaten in a long long time.

This evening Lisa used her George Foreman Grill and grilled vegetables, squash, zucchini,and red peppers, and then she grilled marinated salmon. It was absolutely wonderful.

We will be going home tomorrow. sigh

Saturday, December 29, 2007

More Low Carb Recipes

We have enjoyed our second day with our children. It is fun to have the whole family together. We get along well, but give each other lots of space to 'do our own thing'.
When we visit Lisa and Adam we always have new experiences. On this visit we went to Grapevine Mill Outlet Mall, seeing many stores which are not in our small town. People, people everywhere.
I always leave Dallas with a new appreciation of our small town.

We always have new food experiences also. This morning Lisa made Low Carb Breakfast Burritos, made with low carb tortillas, and scrambled eggs cooked with banana peppers, and chicken apple sausage. This evening she made lettuce wraps. This is made with iceberg lettuce leaves, stir-fry chicken, and vegetables in peanut sauce. We put the stir-fry mixture in the lettuce leaves, rolled up the leaves and ate them. Great!!! We also had edimame beans which was a totally new experience for me. These beans are cooked in the shell, but are taken out of the shell to be eaten. Very interesting.
This evening she has made individual peanut butter pies and peanut butter balls, made with Splenda. Ymmmmmm
Watching my daughter, now all grown up, doing all grown up things and doing them well, is very rewarding and satisfying. I am very proud of her.

Lisa's Low Carb Meal Ideas

Rick and I are spending three days with our daughter, son-in-law, and their 2 cats, having a late Christmas celebration, and just enjoying being together. Lisa is extremely creative in everything she does, and that includes cooking. While I am here I'll share with you some of the meals she prepares for us.

Lisa has an extra challenge with her meal choices and cooking. Her husband, for health reasons cannot eat certain kinds of meat, particularly beef. Adam does eat turkey and chicken because they tend to be the best of all the meats for him. Meat or any product coming from a hoofed animal really cause him problems. including milk, cheese, ice cream, etc. Lisa has done amazingly well at adapting recipes to fit Adam's dietary requirements.

After arriving at their apartment yesterday afternoon, we went to Central Market which is always an adventure for Rick and I. You see, in our small town our ONLY grocery stores are Walmart and HEB (a small one at that). We get so excited to seeing all the wonderful produce and amazing choices of products we have never seen before. I love weighing the produce and printing out the price labels.

For dinner last night Lisa prepared Stuffed Bell Peppers, steamed broccoli, and chocolate ice cream (sugar free and milk free). The bell pepper stuffing was a mixture of ground turkey, spices, mushrooms, chopped onion, banana peppers and spices, topped with BBQ sauce drizzled on top. The ice cream was made from cocoa (getting our antioxicents!), soy milk, tofu, Splenda, and not much else. They have a wonderful ice cream maker that had finished freezing the ice cream by the time we finished the meal. Everything was perfect.

I am looking forward to the next 2 days and will share with you more about the things we eat and Lisa's creative meal ideas.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

By Losing I have Won.......

Yesterday I bought me some new jeans----one size smaller!!!! Thank you, thank you for the standing ovation!

It felt so good to to walk through the store and ignore the larger sizes and the plus sizes. Standing in the dressing room, trying on the jeans, and looking in the mirror at myself was great!!!

By losing 25 pounds (so far), I have won.... fitting in smaller clothes, looking better in my clothes, liking what I see when I look in the mirror, lower blood pressure, lower blood sugar levels, more energy, and a general sense of well being.

Yes, winning these things and more, is worth saying 'no' to processed sugar, and processed carbs. Right now I don't even remember all the foods to which I have said no. Instead I am just excited about being able to wear some of my 'not so fat clothes'.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

New Year's Resolutions and Losing Weight

I love it when when a new year begins. Yep. The new year is like a fresh sheet of paper. There is nothing on it. There are no mistakes. No eraser marks. No sloppy writing. It is only fresh and clean, not empty, but rather covered with potential. Potential for good things, wonderful things to be written, as well as potential for writing about things that are not so good. Potential for writing about successes as well as failures. Potential for growth and learning as well as potential for laziness and sloppiness. Yes, a new year is like a fresh sheet of paper.

I often begin the new year with resolutions, things I resolve to do or do better. This year is not different, except that I am choosing a different approach. I am choosing to think of this year as a new book, a fresh book, with no mistakes, no eraser marks, and no sloppy writing. This new year is fresh and clean, not empty, but rather filled with potential.

Each new day in this new year is like a page in my book. I am going to look at each new day this year as being covered with potential for doing good things for myself and those around me, for growth and learning, and for becoming all that God intends for me to be.

My resolutions will be make each day and they will last only for that day, that page in my book. One day at a time. For today, I resolve to eat only what is good for me and exercise. Just for today I will be attentive to my friends, family, and business. Just for today I will seek God's will every decision I make. Just for today.

Yes, this year will be like a book.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

One Piece---Not Enough? Or Too Much?

It was just one piece. I'm not sure what kind of cake it was. It had white frosting. It looked delicious. The pieces were cut small, just over an inch square. I ate just one piece. That was all. No, I didn't get another one. Why? The only reason....we were getting ready to leave the restaurant and it wasn't convenient. That's it. If it hadn't been for that one and only reason, I would have eaten at least one more piece, maybe two.

So back to my question. Was eating one piece too much or not enough? For me, it was too much, because my sweet tooth never, never knows when to quit.

What about you? Are you satisfied after one piece of cake, fudge, brownie? Or is your stopping point when someone or something else stops you?

If you are like me and have no internal 'stopping power', then it is indeed best if one piece is too many and we have none at all!

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Gall Blader - less and Feeling Better!

Since my last post I have been to the doctor for a surgery followup visit after having my gall bladder removed. At that time the surgeon told me that all was well with me and to go resume life as before which I have done. I am really feeling well with little weakness or pain, except when I sneeze or cough (major ouch!).
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers during this time. I do appreciate it.
With the return of my strength after surgery as come the return of my appetite. Hmmmmmm. I have gained a couple of pounds. grrrrrrrr
This is a crucial time for me. I must once again take hold of my food addiction lion and keep him on a tight leash while I adjust once again to the low carb/no sugar way of eating.
Because I believe in its benefits, I am continuing to have cocoa in my coffee every day. Have you had your cocoa today?

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Adopting A Hospice Patient

Being able to make a difference in the lives of others in turn makes a difference in our own lives. Mary Kay always said, "All we send into the lives of others comes back into our own tenfold."

Many Hospice patients have very little family support and are likely to receive almost nothing for Christmas. Our Mary Kay unit is 'adopting' local Hospice patients who fit in this category. We are working to make sure they each have a special gift for Christmas. We have put together a $35 gift set which includes a lip balm, hand cream, and hydrating lotion, all wonderful products to sooth and moisturize dry skin, with a beautiful gift bag and personalized gift tag. We know these gift sets will be much appreciated by the Hospice patients who receive them.

If you would like to partner with us and donate one or more gift sets, log on to my website www.marykay.com/dfoster1

On my website order the lip balm, hand cream, and hydrating lotion. You can do a search for them if needed. In the customer comments section write Hospice patient and I will know you want to adopt a Hospice patient. I will charge your card $35 for each set you order which will include tax and the gift bag. You will receive a certificate for $10 in MK product for each gift set you donate.

If you prefer to adopt a Hospice patient in your area, I'm sure we can work that out. Just put that in the comment section as well.

It is always wonderful to give to others, because each of us has had the opportunity to receive. It is my prayer that God will bless each Hospice Patient who receives a Mary Kay gift set as well as everyone who gives one.

I Won't Have the Gall to Do That Any More!

Yes, that comment came from my pastor.
I had gall bladder surgery on Dec. 7, and am just now sitting back down at my computer to begin catching up on things. The surgery went very well, and I have seven souvenir gall stone stones ranging from pea to dime size to show for it.
The pain and nausea from this surgery has been low to moderate, but the level of weakness and fatigue has been high. My senior Mary Kay director shared some wisdom with me that has been right on target. She told me that gall bladder surgery is confusing to the body and system. We normally associate surgery with acute pain and suffering. Because I am not experiencing much of either, my mind wants to dismiss the fact that I have had surgery, while my body has been traumatized and is very much feeling the effects of it. I need to allow my body to heal on its terms and give it time to do just that.
At this point I must be wise and allow that process to go forward. Oh, yes, I lost another pound!

Monday, December 3, 2007

Thanksgiving Pounds GONE!

Yep. That's right. The pounds I gained at Thanksgiving are gone plus one more! I have now lost a total of 25 pounds!!!!! Yes, yes. Thank you for the applause.
This is so much fun. I looked in my closet this morning and found a 'formerly' too tight dress, that now fits perfectly!!! WoooHooo!!!!
It is really pretty easy for me now. The hardest part of this diet was the beginning. Making the intial committment, and then getting past the first week or two. At first you wonder how on earth you can make it through a meal, let alone a day, without carbs or sugar. The answer: you just do. That's it. Everytime you do make it through a meal or a day without the 'bad for you stuff', then you have more power to make it through the next meal or the next day.
It can be done. I am doing it and you can too!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

A Look Back at Thanksgiving

It is over. Our children have gone home. We had a wonderful time. Sigh. We miss them already. Thanks to some ice and snow in West Texas, we have a couple of extra days with our son, daughter, and son-in-law. We played games, watched movies, cooked and ate and cooked and ate. Sigh. We miss them already, but we treasure the memories of the time we had with them. Our children are doing well with their lives and we are very proud of them.

OK. The scales show that I gained 4 pounds during Thanksgiving week. Not good. Thinking back to all I ate, I conclude that I did not drastically go off my diet. The only serious carbs I had were in the dressing. The only serious sugar I ate were reduced sugar desserts. However, the amount of food I consumed was more than I would have normally eaten. Hmmmmmm

Lessons learned: All carbs are serious carbs. All sugar is serious sugar. Portion control is important even when the food you are eating meets the 'legal' diet requirements.

Did I ruin everything? Am I discouraged? By no means. As soon as the children left, my eating habits went back to my preThanksgiving eating plan, and I am confident that those 4 pounds will soon be history.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Mary Kay Commercial

Mary Kay, Inc. is giving away $1000/day until Nov. 28 in our annual Give Thanks Sweepstakes. If you do not have a Mary Kay Consultant, please log on to my website: www.marykay.com/dfoster1 and register. While you are there, check out our fabulous Mary Kay Christmas ideas and do a virtual makeover. You can do your Christmas shopping from the comfort of your computer and try new glamour looks for yourself. Place orders and I will mail your product to you asap. Receive a gift if your order is $40 or more.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Sugar Free/Low Carb Recipes!

It was truly a great day! We enjoyed our day trip to Lubbock, our visit with Ma-ma (my mother-in-law), our Thanksgiving meal, and our drive back home to our yard covered with about 5 inches of snow!

Lisa made a couple of fantastic sugar free/low carb desserts from recipes she found on www.about.com

I must let you know that we varied the recipes found on the website somewhat due to time and ingredient issues.

Sugar-Free Pumpkin Pie
  • 9-inch pie pastry
  • 16-ounce can pumpkin (we used 15 oz. can)
  • 12-ounce can evaporated milk
  • 3 eggs
  • 3/4 cup artificial sweetener (we used Splenda, could have increased this a little to make it sweeter)
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon*
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger*
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg*
  • 1/8 teaspoon cloves*
*or 2 teaspoons pumpkin spice

Preparation:
Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Beat pumpkin, milk, and eggs. Beat in rest of ingredients. Pour into uncooked pie shell. Bake for 40 minutes or until knife inserted near center comes out clean. Cool on wire rack. Serve with sugar free whipped cream.



Low Carb Cheesecake
  • 3 packages (1 and 1/2 lbs.) cream cheese (room temperature)
  • 4 eggs (preferably room temperature)
  • 1 and 1/2 teaspoon (1/2 tbs.) vanilla
  • 1 and 1/2 teaspoon (1/2 tbs.) lemon juice
  • 1 and 1/3 cups of artificial sweetener (we used Splenda)
  • 1/4 cup sour cream
  • Crust:
  • 1 cup almond meal
  • 2 T melted butter
  • 2 T artificial sweetener
For the crust we decided to use an unbaked pie crust because time was an issue yesterday.

Preparation:
Preheat oven to 375 F. Put cream cheese in mixing bowl and beat until fluffy. Add other ingredients, scraping the bowl and beaters often. When all ingredients are combined, scrape one more time, beat one more minute, and pour mixture into pan.
Raise the temp of the oven to 400 and begin baking the cheesecake. Bake for about an hour, dropping the temperature of the oven every 15 minutes or so till it is baking at 200 at the end. We took it out of the oven when the cheesecake was firm to the touch , but slightly soft on the sides.

We enjoyed making these desserts and we enjoyed eating them even more because they were both low carb and sugar-free!!!


Tuesday, November 20, 2007

They Arrived today!

My daughter and son-in-law and son arrived this evening for a very fast week of fun, playing games, traveling to see grandmothers, watching movies, looking at old family photos, and of course, eating.
As I mentioned before, cooking for this week is going to be a challenge. Our son, Jonathan, is not following the same diet as the rest of us. In his 'honor' I baked an 'apple dump cake'. This proved to be too much of a temptation for Rick, my husband, and Adam, my son-in-law. Oh, well. They make their own choices.
For dinner this evening we had rotisserie chicken, saute' Italian vegetables, field peas, and tomato wedges. This was easy to do and was totally 'legal'.
Tomorrow Lisa and I will be preparing the Thanksgiving meal, which will consist of several low carb/no sugar dishes.
I will share the menu and recipes with you.
It is my prayer that you will enjoy a wonderful time with your family this week, giving thanks for God's blessings in our lives.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Holiday Eating the Low Carb Way

This is going to be an interesting holiday season. Yes, I have been on diets before during Christmas and Thanksgiving. Some years I have succeeded in staying faithful to my diet, and at other times I have been unsuccessful. I have cooked traditional turkey and dressing and all the desserts and eaten only moderate amounts of the same turkey and dressing and none of the desserts. I can do it. Right now my motivation is strong and I seem to have pretty good control.
The difference this time is that there is more of the family involved in this diet, and some of the things I have cooked in previous years just won't do now. It is actually going to be quite fun, I think. Lisa, my daughter, and I are collaborating on the menu, not just for Thanksgiving Day, but for their entire visit. She is quite creative and has some great ideas.
I will share with you some of our 'wins' and 'losses' in the next week.

My Last Dose of Prednizone!!!! Yea!!!

It seemed like a long time, but it really wasn't. Nine days. That is all. Now my blood sugar and weight can go back to their 'rightful' places.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Prednisone, High Blood Sugar, Weight Gain, and Patience....Sigh

This too shall pass.....This too shall pass.
This is my second round of Prednizone.
My first started just over 3 weeks ago. My doctor prescribed it as an attempt to reduce the inflammation in my feet due to painful growing heel spurs.
The second began 5 days ago to help clear congestion and infection in my chest that was possibly going to cause pneumonia.
The first time I noticed some weight gain, difficulty sleeping, and higher blood sugar, but I did not feel bad.
This time my blood sugar has soared into numbers that are scary for me and I have felt very strange. I have been very thirsty, jittery, and have had difficulty thinking when my blood sugar is high. Typing on the computer is a chore and I have to really concentrate to get an intelligent sentence written.
It is time to put things in perspective. This is not the rest of my life. Just 4 more days. Then things will return to normal.....my blood sugar......being able to sleep at night......being able to think 'in a straight line'.........and this weight gain will be gone!!!! Patience........

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Things I Have Won So Far By Losing Weight

It is fun. By saying "No" to things I shouldn't eat, and saying "Yes" only to things that I should eat, I have opened my life to many good things.
It is true, I believe, that having self discipline in one area of your life will give you freedom in other areas. By losing weight, I am now winning many good things in other parts of my life.
I have now lost about 22 pounds. WooooHooooo!
1. This amount of weight loss is now noticeable and , believe me, my friends, family, and Mary Kay sisters in pink, are now noticing. I am consistently receiving compliments such as, "you look great", "You have lost weight!", "I am so proud of you!" I love it!!
2. I am now able to wear some of my "not so fat" clothes! This week I wore a pair of khaki pants that I had not worn in 3 or 4 years. Yes!!!!
3. I received the results of my blood work, and everything, everything was within normal ranges. My blood sugar, my A1C test, cholesterol, and triglycerides were all normal!!! The only thing that was a little high was my LDL level and that was considerably lower than the last test. Yea!!!!!

This all feels very good and is very gratifying. I have won all these wonderful rewards, some long term and some short term, by losing weight. This is only the beginning. I have more to lose and more to win!!!! I can hardly wait (weight)!

If you are like me and need to lose weight so that you can win better health and better self esteem, please don't wait! Begin now. Yes, you can control it during the coming holiday season! I know you can. Just start!

Monday, November 5, 2007

A-1-C Test

I returned home 4 days ago and my grandmother is doing well. She truly is an amazing woman. We have bought her a little more time to be at home and we are both happy.

When I returned home and got on my scales I found that I had actually lost 2 more pounds and so now my total weight loss is about 21 pounds!!!!! Yes. Thank you. Thank you. I always love applause.

Tomorrow I go to the doctor to get the results of my A-1-C test. This is a test which will show my average blood sugar level for the last 3 months. I am actually looking forward to the results because I have been on this diet for 3 months. I'll let you know........

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

A Slippery Person---My Grandmother

A month or so ago I wrote about a teaching in Alcoholics Anonymous which advises us (compulsive people) to avoid slippery people, slippery places, and slippery things which can and will slowly, but surely cause us to slide right 'off the wagon' and back to the dessert table every time.

I have been spending a lot of time with my grandmother the last six weeks because she has been very ill. At the moment I am staying with her for a few days, working to get her reestablished at home so that she can once again live alone with the help of a daytime caretaker. My vocabulary is not large or colorful enough to adequately share with you what a wonderful person she is and how much I love her.

I do have a problem, however, when I visit her at her home for an extended period of time. She is indeed, a slippery person in my life. When I am with her, my controlled path of healthy eating slowly gives way, one bite at a time, to consuming or desiring to consume foods that are 'illegal'. It is not that she encourages me to eat 'all the wrong things'. She doesn't even come close to doing that. I think it would take a therapist's skill to peal back all the emotional layers in my life and clarify why my grandmother affects my dietary control that way.

My plans are to leave in a three more days if all goes well with her. Can I stay in complete control this entire time? Truthfully. Most likely not. However, I know that this 'side trip' is temporary and my own home is not a 'slippery place'. So until then, I will do my best to not completely lose control, taking it one snack, one meal, one day at a time.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

My New Favorite Way to Cook Squash

I love this new method of preparing squash. Yellow squash is what I used when I prepared this dish last week, but I think you could to this with just about any variety of squash.
In a sprayed frying pan I put a small amount of olive oil, oh, about a couple of tablespoons, cut squash (sliced, cut slices in half or quarters, depending on the size of the squash), 1/2 cup chopped onion (or more if you would like), seasoning (I sprinkled butter flavored vegetable seasoning). Cover and cook over medium to low heat. Stir frequently. Cook about 15 minutes or until the squash is tender. Yuuuummmmmm.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Eating the Low Carb Way

One of the things that made me almost decide against going on this diet was that eating anything I wanted was just sooooo easy! I didn't have to think about carbs or sugars or portions at all. If it sounded good and if it was easy, I made it and ate it! Yep, and I had and still have many extra pounds, high blood pressures, diabetes, acid reflux, and pain in my feet to show for it.

Now things have still changed, but I still go for easy and quick in food preparation. I am not perfect by any means, but I do not want to trade my overeating compulsion for a 'proper' eating obsession. So....all things in moderation.

As I share with you some of the dishes I have made and some of my daughter's creative meal ideas, please keep in mind that we are Texan and we do things simply. I live in a small town in West Texas so the variety of meats, fruits, and vegetables in our stores are not as great as in larger cities. Lisa, living in a metropolitan area, has more food choices and loves to cook with lots of variety. I look forward to her contributions.

Readers, if you have recipes or cooking tips which are beneficial to us 'low carb' people, please feel free to share by way of comments or you can email me and I will paste it into this blog.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Downsizing My Size

It is so great to get on the scales and see a smaller number come up! yep! I am down 18 pounds now!!!
I wish someone one would explain something to me. Ok, this may come under the category of TMI (too much information), but it is necessary for my question. I bathe at night. My habit is to weigh just before I get in the tub and then again after I get out. It always happen. Even though I am dressed or undressed in exactly the same way both times, I always weigh a half pound to one pound more! I just do not understand how getting into a tub of water can make me weigh more. I don't let it bother me. In fact, I'm not sure why I even weigh at that time, but I do. Just habit.

As I have written in previous posts, the number on the scales is not what is most important. The number on the scales will take care of itself when I am not abusing food, when my addition lion is in his cage. I must be eating carefully, with intention, not with compulsion and thoughtlessness. When I do that, then downsizing my size will happen!!!

Sunday, October 14, 2007

It has been several days, 10 days in fact, since I have added a post to this blog. My apologies to all of you.
Today I would like to share some thoughts about this diet, this 'no processed carb, no processed sugar, diet. By the way, it is still working for me.....16 pounds lost. Thank you, Thank you, I appreciate your standing ovation.
As I have previously written, I am not a medical professional. I have no formal training in nutrition, and by no means, an expert in dieting and eating healthy. That said. I do have some opinions about this kind of diet.
I have some concerns about this diet, when it is followed to the point of 'perfection'. It is my belief that when God created us, He designed us to be completely vegetarian, vegan, if you will. Scripture shows, that in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve did not kill and eat the animals. They ate fruit and vegetables. After the flood, God gave permission for us to eat animals. That said, I am not a vegetarian. However, I do not eat large amounts of meat, as some would to on a no carb diet.
I have also read (no, I don't have the documentation, right now) that too much protein leaches calcium from bones, which can contribute to osteoporosis. Also, people who have a diet high in meat, especially beef, have a higher rate of colon cancer.
Therefore, in my diet, I try to limit my meat intake and eat more vegetable and some fruit. Yes, there are some carbs in fruits and veggies, but they are naturally occurring carbs, making them less of a threat to my blood sugar levels. I stay away from potatoes completely, and don't drink fruit juicts. Too much concentrated sugar.
So, I am doing following this diet in its purest form, and probably never will. However, I am using its basic requirement, and I am winning a healthier body, by losing extra (many exta) pounds!

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Post Crisis Overeating

Sometimes the real temptation to use food as a release, as a comfort, as a diversion is not in the midst of a crisis, but rather when the crisis begins to pass. We tend to have pent up emotions as well as fatigue which rises to the surface when the adrenalin of the moment begins to subside.

I was reminded of that today when I walked into the hospital cafeteria and saw the pasteries again. No, I wasn't seriously tempted to 'go astray', but the thoughts that crossed my mind were enough to let me know that I can not let down my guard even a little bit.

Mom, my grandmother, is slowly recovering, slowly getting stronger. The crisis has passed. I am tired physically and emotionally. It would be so easy to give in to the temptation, to just have one cinnamon roll or some other equally delicious but 'evil' dish.

Each and every time we say 'no' to our overeating temptation, we also say 'yes' to being a stronger person, not being driven and controlled by our addictions.

Monday, October 1, 2007

Rough Sledding, No Emotional Eating. So Far

After spending a couple of days at home, I am now back with my grandmother who is still in the hospital. We have had some very 'rough sledding', but right now she seems to be stable. The doctor is challenging her digestive system with liquid feeding down the NG tube in her nose. I told Mom that we are checking to make sure her plumbing system is working.

As I was making the 1 1/2 hour drive from my home to the hospital, I began to realize that during my stay with her, I need to help her begin to understand that she will not be able to go back home and also to understand that there is a time when she will need to quit fighting and allow death to come.
Oh, this will be hard. I think it will be harder than talking about death with my parents. I'm not sure why, but it will.

So far, I have not lost control of my diet. I have done NO emotional eating. My addiction lion is firmly under control. So far. This walk down the path of saying good by to my grandmother is not over, and I may one day suddenly decide to seek comfort in some sugar filled, carb filled foods. I hope not, but you never know. I am not perfect.

Tomorrow I want to talk about what happens next if indeed I do 'fall off the wagon'.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

I am such a visual person when it comes to food. My temptations to eat wrong things are much stronger when I can see the 'offending food'. Because I know this, I try to have tunnel vision when it comes to food. I try not to allow myself to gaze longingly at foods that I love, but do not fit in my eating plan. But you know there are times when I get caught off guard.
I walked into the hospital cafeteria this morning, having already decided what I was going to have for breakfast, bacon and 2 eggs, over medium. Had I not already made this decision, I could have easily been derailed by the first food I laid eyes on--breakfast rolls, covered in caramel and pecans and frosted cinniman rolls. Oh my, they looked good. No, they looked delicious. Yes, after just a second or two, I went straight to the grill and ordered my eggs. No, lingering by the sugary foods. Not allowed.
For me, it is the unexpected foods that pose the biggest temptations. I can decide ahead of time and 'steel' myself when I know what foods I will be faced with. It is the 'suddenly in your face' moments that are almost my undoing. At those times, I allow myself no time to waver, no time to negotiate, no opportunity to say yes. I quickly turn away and stay focused on what I know is right, what I know is best for me- staying true to my diet and healthy lifestyle.
These moments are not easy, but I am always glad when I have made the best decision, the right decision.

Monday, September 24, 2007

As We Become Stronger, Our Temptations Grow Weaker

I am writing this post sitting on my cot next to my grandmother's hospital bed. After staying at home for a couple of days, I returned to the hospital to continue caring for her. She is so precious and there is no where in the world that I would rather be than right here. She is continuing to improve, but at the same time seems weaker. Sigh.

The food selections here at the hospital are still not great, but I am confident that I will be able to find something to eat that will keep me on the 'straight and narrow' of my diet. When I went home I found that I had lost 3 pounds last week!!! Yea!!

Trying to control overeating urges is such a challenge. It can be so difficult, and at times, it seems impossible. The truth is, however, that it is not impossible. Easy? No, of course not. If it were easy, we would all be within our proper weight ranges, because none of us enjoys looking and feeling the way we do. Right?

How do we ever get our eating under control? These are my thoughts on the matter. They seem to work for me and perhaps they will help you.

It all begins with a commitment. Preferably a commitment that is made when you are not in the midst of a crisis, especially an emotional one. It is seldom that any kind of commitment made during a turbulent time in our lives actually 'sticks'. I think that is because the commitment is made from an emotional need, rather than being a mental decision.

Once a commitment is made to begin a diet or eating plan, you must not wait. The next time you see food, you must decide right then whether or not to eat it. Don't wait till next week, or till you get to the store to buy the food you will need. You must start immediately. Waiting will make you waver in your commitment.

Each and every time you eat, review your commitment in your mind. You may need to, once again, think about all the reasons you are wanting to lose weight. Think about the benefits that having a 'down sized' body will bring. Allow those thoughts to give you motivation as you chose what you will eat.

If you are an emotional overeater as I am, if an emotional crisis will make you run for the fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy every time, then take heart. Work on your commitment to a healthy way of eating when you are not in crisis. Say no to the sugar and carbs when there is no emotional reason to say yes. Say no when you are at a church dinner and the food is so close and so tempting. Say no when you are at a wedding and the groom's cake is your favorite flavor. Say no when it would be easier to pop a pizza in the oven rather than make a salad.

By saying no to all those temptations during the 'easy times', you gain strength. I believe that strength is stored up, in your heart, perhaps in your mind, I am not sure. I just know that strength can grow. Every time you make the right food choices, you grow stronger in your commitment and the temptation grows weaker.

That same strength that is drawn on when an emotional crisis hits and you want to, when you think about, when you know you deserve to eat everything in sight.

I believe that is what happened to me last week when I admitted Mom into the hospital. Physically and emotionally I was having a very difficult time and it would have been so easy to toss everything out the window, and eat to my heart's and belly's content. I didn't do that, however, because I had some 'stored up' strength from previous temptation victories.

Please do not think that I have totally conquered and will never again be tempted to overeat. Oh, no. As I said at the beginning of this blog, I am a fellow struggler and always will be. However, I must say that now I have hope. Hope of one day being able to wear 'skinny' clothes. Hope of being able to look in the mirror and like what I see. Hope of not suffering the effects of diabetes. Hope of, once again, being a healthy size.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Food: My Drug of Choice, Again? NO!!!

In my last post, I wrote about taking my grandmother, Mom, for a cat scan, ( I think is really called a CT scan), and not being able to eat for 9 1/2 hours. The next segment of this story is that we placed her in the hospital the next day with the diagnosis of a blocked small intestine. Oh, she was so miserable, so very sick. She was in pain and she was throwing up bile that came straight from her small intestine. If any of you have had a similar problem, you know exactly what she was throwing up. If you haven't, then you don't want to know. Just understand that it was horrible. Horrible for her and for me as well. I generally have a strong stomach, but not during this. Oh, no.
Mom did so very little complaining. She is the strongest person and the most emotionally healthy person I have ever known. I will probably write more about her in my other blog, "When Families Have Cancer". In the throes of the worst pain, she still complained very little, but she would just lie in bed and whimper. Oh, my goodness, that was heart wrenching.
I stayed by her side as the nurses attempted to insert a tube into her nose that would go down into her stomach. This tube would suck out the bile in her stomach, reducing the nausea and vomiting. It hurt her so badly and the attempts were unsuccessful. They did get it into her stomach, but she was strangling on the tube. She just couldn't breath so they took it out. The nurses decided that the benefits to her would be outweighed by the risks. Oh, my heart was breaking. Putting my little 96 year old grandmother through this was almost more than I could take.
When I did have the opportunity to go to the hospital cafeteria, I found hamburgers, fried chicken strips, fried catfish, desserts, and more 'illegal' foods. The salad bar was not bad, but not great. Hmmmm Yes, I had a perfect excuse to grab a hamburger. After all, the last couple of days had been very rough. I deserved it, don't you think?
It was somewhat tempting, but because of previous food victories, I kept my addition lion on a tight leash and went straight to the salad bar! Thank you for your applause!
I refuse to allow food to be my 'comfort' during this time. It really isn't, you know. Food does not really provide comfort. Just like other drugs and alcohol, it may provide a temporary release, a temporaty escape, but afterwards, after the hamburger and french fries are gone, after the chocolate frosted brownie with pecans has been 'inhaled', you will feel just as bad or worse that you did before. More on this to come in another post.
The good news: yesterday afternoon Mom seemed to 'turn a corner' and is doing much better. If this progress continues, she should be able to go home in a few days and continue her life as before, being the light and joy in the lives of all who know her.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

No food, No Problem!

What a long day it was. It was a day that made me very aware of how my current eating plan has benefited my blood sugar levels. This alone is reason enough to not go back to my old way of eating.
My 96 year old grandmother, Mom, is sick. She has not been feeling well for several days and her caretaker called me. I set up a doctor's appointment for her and drove to her house which is about 112 miles from my home. I spent the night at her house, got up early the next morning, and fixed breakfast for both of us. I ate a boiled egg and some cottage cheese.
We ate about 8:00 that morning. Her doctor's appointment was scheduled for 10:00. After his examination, he wanted her to have a cat scan that afternoon. We went straight to the hospital so that the test preparations could begin.
Because of this there was no opportunity for me to each lunch. The 'preps' for the cat scan did not go well at first because Mom threw up the solution they asked her to drink. They gave her some medication, and she was able to drink that awful stuff and keep it down. Yea!
This hold up delayed the test for about 2 hours. I still had no food. We did not get home until after 5:00 P.M., which meant that I went over 10 hours without eating.
As a result of being on a no processed carb diet, I could go without food for this length of time without having a 'hypoglycemic moment'. My blood sugar stayed level enough that I did not 'crater' and get the shakes or become light headed. I was hungry and yes, my stomach did growl, but it was not a problem. I could handle a growling stomach.
In my previous high carb life, the day would have been a disaster. I would have had a major hypoglycemic attack which would have not been a good thing, especially with me trying to take care of Mom.
I had read that one of the benefits of this kind of diet was the stabilization of blood sugar which sounded great to me. However, having experienced it personally made me appreciate this eating plan even more.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Another Pound Gone!!! WoooooHoooooo!!!

Another pound gone!!!!! WoooHoooo!!! Thank you! Thank you! I appreciate your standing ovation!

Yes, it feels good. No, it feels great to see the numbers on the scales get smaller and smaller. I still have much more weight to lose of course, but progress is being made!

When your weight puts you in the category of being obese, then a larger amount of weight must be lost before people around you begin to notice.

For example, a weight loss of 10 pounds on someone who started at 120 pounds will show more than the same weight loss on someone who started at 200.

My weight loss at this time is about 13 1/2 pounds. Not enough for most people to notice. Rather than letting that discourage me, I choose to take the focus off what others may or may not say. I choose to focus on the following statement:

Every 5 pounds I lose shows more than the 5 pounds before it!

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Low and No Carb Eating

I thought I would share with you some of the 'legal' foods that my husband and I have enjoyed these last few weeks. Living in a small town makes it somewhat difficult to find the variety of low/no carb foods. We just do the best we can.
We are eating many more fresh fruits and vegetables. We are eating different kinds of leaf lettuces, cucumbers, celery, broccoli, carrots, onions and tomatoes, to name a few. We also enjoy fresh spinach and squash. We love fresh apples, pears, grapes, bananas, cantelope, peaches, and oranges. We have to be careful not to over eat some of the fruits because of the sugar content.
We are not drinking fruit juices for the same reason.
I have cooked various kinds of beans, but our favorite continues to be black beans.
We just finished eating all the venison left from last year's deer season. :( We had not bought beef in months, but now we will begin once again to eat beef. However, at the current prices we will not eat a lot of beef.
I buy frozen chicken breasts and cook those in a variety of ways. We love baked salmon, seasoned with soy sauce.
We are eating cottage cheese with fruit for breakfast or bacon and boiled eggs.
We also eat a variety of cheeses.
It is all working because now I have lost 12 pounds!!!!!! Thank you for your applause.

Friday, September 14, 2007

No Self Pity Here

It was in 1992, I think. Yes, it was in January (as per New Years Resolution), 1992, that I joined Overeaters Anonymous. When I joined I immediately committed to living as a recovering compulsive overeater and daily, sometimes hourly, sought to refrain from abusing food.
I mentioned in a previous post about going to teacher's meetings, church fellowships, and other such activities and not eating anything, just drinking a diet soda or water.
Right from the 'get go' I decided that I would not allow self pity to be a part of my recovery. I would not look longly at someone else's plate and wish for what they were eating. I would not talk about the things I could not eat. I would not try to make anyone feel guilty for eating 'forbidden' foods in my presence.
When I was in a situation that involved those foods, I decided to concentrate just on the people I was with and enjoy their friendship and fellowship rather than putting on a long, "poor me" face.
Yes, it was a conscious decision. It didn't just happen. I had to make it happen. There were times when self pity would have been so easy, and everyone would have understood why I would be 'blue'. After all not being able to eat that cheesecake is kinda sad.
However, choosing to be positive rather than negative about my addiction, helped me to concentrate on the things I was gaining, by losing weight.
Life is so much better when you choose to be optimistic rather than pessimistic. Don't you agree?

Saturday, September 8, 2007

What is "Will Power"?

There was a period of about 5 years when I ate no, I repeat no, processed sugar at all. Not one bite. No cake, no brownies, no pies, no cookies, no candy, no oatmeal (tastes awful without sugar). No sugar at all.
I remember going to church fellowships, teachers meetings, etc, and drinking a glass of diet cola or water. Because everything served has sugar, I sipped my drink, and watched others eat.
Invariably someone would ask, "Are you going to eat something?" My response was always, "No, I'm not eating today. I don't eat sugar anymore."
With a look of amazement on her face, the next response was always, "You have amazing will power. I could never do that. I just can't pass up sweets."
The truth of the moment was just the opposite. It is the person who may not be able to pass up sweets, but can stop eating them after a serving or two that truly has will power. Because I have no will power, because once I can't stop eating sweets once I start, then I must avoid them all together.
Yes. For me there is no such thing as a bite or two of candy, a serving of chocolate cate, or a single piece of pie. Soooooo I do not eat these things at all.
I do not feel sorry for myself either. That is for another post.
I hope you will have a weight loss victory today, if you need one.

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Sour Cream and Onion Potato Chips, oh my!

It has been several days since my last post. Life has been busy. My husband, Rick and I kept our twin nieces (age 8) over the Labor Day weekend. They are precious little girls who can keep you very busy. We enjoy keeping them.
I told their mother (my sister) that since we have been on our diet, our supply of snacks was very limited. Therefore, she sent snacks with the girls. Sweet, sugary snacks or salty, carb filled snacks. I knew and was prepared for the entrance of the dangerous foods into my kitchen. Yes, they were dangerous to me, because any one of them cause me to loose control of my 'lion', my eating addiction. I was prepared for everything except the Sour Cream and Onion Potato Chips! Just the sight of the package bothered me. It was almost overwhelming.
Almost.....but not quite. My strategy was to keep them out of sight and that truly helped. The girls knew where they were, and I knew where they were, but by keeping then put away, I could better exercise my 'out of sight, out of mind' strategy. It worked! I did not even come close to eating even one chip! Another battle won!!!!!

Oh, yes, I am now down 10 1/2 pounds!!! Thank you, thank you for your applause.
I am now at one of those 'milestone' weights. You know, a number that ends with a '0' or a '5'. Yep, at least in my mind, those are the more important numbers. They are like another step down. I love it when I reach those numbers.

One of the things I have learned in Mary Kay is the importance of having a goal. It is by reaching and stretching to reach a goal that we grow personally. Here is my weight loss goal. One of the at least.

In January we will have a Mary Kay Conference. It is an annual event only for Mary Kay Directors called "Leadership". This year the conference will be held in Houston and because I am a new director, it will be my first Leadership event to ever attend. I am so very excited about being a part of this amazing conference. We will have evenings during this conference when formal attire will be required.
It is my goal to be able to wear a particular dress which is at this moment tooooooooo small. I love this dress, but have only worn it one time....to my daughter's wedding 5 years ago. In order to wear it again, I must lose about 30 more pounds! I have approximately 4 months to reach this goal and I am very determined to do so.

Trust me I will keep you 'posted' on my progress. OK. Pun intended.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Pictures of a Previous Me

Yesterday I was looking through a stack of pictures that were taken about 8 years ago. During that time in my life I was going through a 'skinny' season. Six years previous to the taking of these particular pictures, I lost about 75 pounds and had regained only about 10 pounds. I hate to brag.....but I looked good in those pictures. Yep, no doubt about it. Weighing less is definitely a positive thing for me.
Seeing those pictures also reminded me of how I felt about myself during that time. Self confidence has never been something I have had an overabundance of, but during that time, that 'skinny season', I really did like myself better.
I selected my favorite photo from the pictures and put it on the mirror of my vanity table so that I can look at it as I put on my makeup each day. It is eight years later. Will I look exactly the same? Of course not, but, hmmmmmm, maybe close to it!!! That will be great!!!
I am a Sales Director with Mary Kay Cosmetics. As such I have a 'director suit' which I purchased at the beginning of this seminar year. It is a wonderful suit, well designed and well sewn. I just love the suit, but it is beginning to get 'roomy'. I think my seamstress will be able to alter it, but eventually, I'll have to buy a new size altogether! That will be great!

Saturday, August 25, 2007

There are many positive aspects to losing weight besides just being able to wear the 'skinny sizes'. I am once again realizing the ways healthier eating is making me, well, more healthy!
I am diabetic, but by eating no processed carbs and no processed sugar, my blood sugar has stabalized within a very normal range. This means that my body is not going to suffer the complications that accompany diabetes (retinopathy, kidney disease, infections, etc) for a long time and perhaps never! No pills, no shots. I can live with that!
I also have IBS, or Irritable Bowel Syndrome. OK, so some of you may think this may come under the category of T.M.I. (too much information). However, I also know that others of you may be fellow IBS suffers. It is not fun, is it? I could get real graphic here, but I won't. Those of you who know what it is like to deal with IBS on a daily basis, don't have to be told the details, and those of you who don't, would not want to know them.
IBS has been part of my life since late elementary school. About 12 years ago a doctor finally prescribed a medication, Bental, that finally brought this condition under control. Yea!!!
However, after about 3 weeks on this eating plan, I have discovered that I no longer need this medication. IBS is not a problem for me as long as I am eating correctly!
If you suffer from IBS, please understand that your condition may not be like mine, and healthy eating may not make any difference for you. But then again, it might! You won't know until you try.
I also have GERD, Gastroesophogeal Reflux Disease, and am still taking medication for that condition. However, I can tell this health problem is getting better as well.
There are many benefits to downsizing our size. Some of these benefits are external; benefits that everyone can see. Some are internal. Those benefits affect our emotional and physical health.
Now that is what I call "win-win" when we 'lose-lose'!!!!

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

One Month

It has been a fast month! Yes, I have completed that first month of my new life long healthy eating plan. My weight loss has been slow, but that is really fine as long as the scales continue to stay 'pointed in the downward direction'. So far I have lost about 7 pounds!
I think I am entering a dangerous stage of my diet. I have become secure, comfortable, perhaps about complacent about my new way of eating. My previous cravings are barely a temptation now. It would be easy to think that I had this 'compulsive overeating thing conquered', and from now on I will be in complete control of 'my addiction lion'.
Years ago, perhaps twenty or more years ago, I lost quite a bit of weight, perhaps 45-50 pounds. I felt good. Enjoyed wearing 'skinny clothes'. Had more energy. More confident. All those things. I told my father, "I have this weight thing conquered. I will never be fat again."
Wrong. I believe this line of thinking was for me one of the sources of my defeat. By thinking I had totally won the victory and that I would never fight this battle again, I began to let my self eat small amounts of those 'trigger foods'.
Why not? I could control this? I can eat just a little bit and then be done with it. Oh, yes. Just like an alcoholic can drink just one beer and be done with it.
This is not a time to let my guard down and sabatoge myself with "'stinkin' thinkin'", but to strenghten my reslove and to even more earnestly keep my 'lion' on a tight leash or in his cage.
Boy, do I look forward to wearing 'skinny clothes' again!

Sunday, August 19, 2007

No Processed Carbs, No Processed Sugar, More energy!!

Yes, I am realizing that by eating the the no processed carbs, and no processed sugar diet, my energy level has increased. Occasionally I do feel tired in the evenings, but that is because I have been 'on the go' all day. There was a time when I needed a 'power nap' after lunch, just 15 minutes to recharge and prepare for the rest of the day. Recently I have found that nap to be unnecessary and I will just keep on goin' after lunch.
The scales are showing a slow but steady weight loss for me. I have lost about 8 pounds in the last month. The slow rate of loss doesn't bother me. I am already feeling better and my clothes are fitting better! Yea!!!!

By the way, I did make the turkey chili/soup that I mentioned in another post. It was great! My husband and I enjoyed it tremendously. It was as filling as it was delicious. Check out the recipie on previous posts.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Weight Loss Victories

How do you define victory when you are trying to 'downsize' your size? Is it reaching your target weight? Is it being able to wear that outfit in that particular size?
All my life I have struggled with my weight. Well, struggled off and on all my life. There were times when I wasn't struggling, when I should have been. Then I would have had less weight to struggle with when I did struggle.
I digress. For years I had a particular weight, a certain number on my scales (no, I'm not going to tell you) that represented victory for me. It didn't matter whether the number on the scales were up or down. I was not happy with my weight unless it was that perfect number.
The problem? I can only remember a couple of times when I actually achieved that weight, and never did I remain at that target number for even a month. Therefore, in my mind, I was always failing at dieting, never succeeding, never happy or satisfied with my weight loss.
After joining Overeaters Anonumous, I began to realize that for me victory must be defined differently if I was going to ever feel successful at this weight loss thing.
Victory is glancing (no, not looking, too dangerous) at the dessert table during a church dinner and walking away. Victory is wanting to snack on Cheesits, but eating an apple instead. Victory is eating one of something instead of two or three.
Weight Loss Victories are small decisions which will make you stronger the next time you face a temptation. They are empowering and motivating. These small decisions, made over and over, will have a cumulative effect on your weight and your self confidence. It is small weight loss victories that will ultimately lead you to your desired weight and size! Let's hear it for small vicotries!!!!
Perhaps you have a Weight Loss Victory you would like to share. We can all be encouraged by your experience. Please tell us about it by commenting on this blog. Thanks for sharing!

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Spaghetti and Cheesecake

Lisa and her husband, along with another man own a private school and have just this week had an influx of new students. They were involved in all the tasks related to enrolling students while their annual book fair was going on and while their partner in the school was on vacation! Needless to say they were 'swamped' with busyness last week.
Lisa and I were instant messaging last night. I asked her how the diet was going during this stressful week. She said that had she not been on the diet, she could not have 'made it'. This type diet has given her more energy that she previously had, and therefore she could handle much more activity and stress.
However she did have her 'moment' of weakness. This is what she wrote:

On Wednesday evening, Adam and I were at the office late for the second day in a row after two nights of poor sleep on my end. I wanted to go to "spaghetti warehouse" and order a Dr. Pepper and a bowl of spaghetti and meatballs. But I didn't. Went to IHOP, had half an omilet, half a bowl of fruit, and a glass of milk

Her commitment to her eating plan was greater than her moment of weakness, and she experienced a victory that will make her stronger, not weaker when the next challenge comes.

Yesterday afternoon they attended a wedding. It was a Christian, Indian (as from India) wedding. Their partner in the school is Indian and it was one of his relatives getting married. Lisa said it was quite interesting. I'm sure it was.

She said that she ate cheesecake during the reception. This is what she wrote me:

Today's Cheesecake was not an impulsive thing. I chose to eat it and know that it does not affect my diet past the moment I took the last bite (which was not all of the cheesecake I might add)


I wouldn't have been able to do that a month ago either


I would have panicked half way through that it wasn't enough

Because she her commitment was in place, she was able to handle the cheesecake and not allow it to permanently destroy her diet.
Yea, Lisa, I am so proud of you!!

Commitment.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Stress and Weight Gain

It's alright. If I can admit it, you can too. For those of us who are compulsive eaters, during times of stress, crisis, and trama, food is our comfort, our friend, our drug of choice. Even though we may have great faith in God and recognize His Presence in our difficult situation, we still cling to food for release and escape.
During the months of turmoil and anguish when my parents both had stage 4 cancer and were in the hospital for weeks at the same time. Food was never far from the ''front burner' in my mind. Many days, by 10:00 a.m., I had already decided what I was going to have for lunch even though it was less than who hours since I had had breakfast. As soon as I finished lunch, I started thinking about dinner. And there ya go. Day after day. Week after Week. Month after month. The pounds kept on coming.
After Daddy passed away, the major stress was over, but the bad eating habits were, well, habits and I did not have what it took to change them. Till now.
I'm not sure why now, except that my daughter gave me hope and inspiration about a month ago when she began to tell me about the diet she and her husband had started. I was ready to embrace this new way of eating with commitment from my head and not emotion from my heart.
In Mary Kay I have learned that working from commitment will keep you focused on a task even when your emotions make you want to quit. Making a decision to change your eating habits is no different.
There are, there will be times when you just don't feel like eating right. It is in those moments, and that is what they are --moments, that the strength of our commitment will take charge over our emotions, pull us through and give us true victory.
Our emotions then will be in charge when we step on the scales and see the numbers going down or when we put on that previously tight outfit and WooooooHoooooo! it is not tight any more. Yea! Cheers!
I write this last paragraph not as one who has allowed this commitment concept to be the dominating control in my life during times of stress. I write instead as one who is a fellow struggler, as one who still gives in to emotional eating from time to time. My charge and challenge to all of us is to, during times of stress and crisis, allow our commitment to becoming a healthy person be in control of what we eat. Yes, again, easier said than done, but we WILL reap a harvest of benefits by being stronger the next time we have a difficult moment, as well as being able to shop for clothes in a smaller size!

Thursday, August 9, 2007

My Sister and Diabetes

My sister, I'll call her Susan, has just been diagnosed with diabetes, Type 2. Apparently she had been diabetic for quite a while, because she is bleeding behind the retinas in her eyes. The retinologist said that she had classic signs of retinopathy, damaged caused by diabetes.
This diagnosis is not surprising because diabetes runs in our family. What is stunning is that she maintains that she has had not symptoms.

My thoughts about this diagnosis and lack of symptoms for Susan come in the form of a lesson for all of us. You see, I believe the symptoms were there and had been there for a long time. For the last several years, Susan has been totally focused on caring for Daddy and Mother, and other personal things in her life. Because of her ‘tunnel vision’, she either was completely unaware of the symptoms or pushed them aside because they seemed unimportant compared to the other concerns with which she was dealing.

The lesson? It is those quiet nagging things in our lives which are so easy to ignore that will one day become an all consuming crisis for ourselves and those who love us. We need to pay attention to what is going on with our bodies and deal with our own health issues in a timely manner, even while life seems to be swirling around us in a chaotic fashion. Easier said than done.

Alli, Relacore, and other Weight Loss Products

When I walk down the aisles of my local Walmart and see all the various weight loss products, it is sometimes tempting to purchase a 'short cut' to a smaller size dress. Yep, I have even taken them off the shelves and checked out the ingredients and directions. Then I put them back and continue with my shopping.
From time to time you hear about health problems that taking one of the products can cause. That doesn't scare me. That is not the cause of my hesitation when it comes to taking a weight loss products.
For me personally I really have two concerns. First, many of these products cause a dullness in appetitie so that you don't feel hungry. As a compulsive overeater, my desire for food has nothing to do with whether or not I am hungry. I can eat just because there is food in front of me. And eat I will. So I doubt that these products would actually make a difference in what or how much I ate.
Secondly, if by chance they did work and dull my appetite, and I did lose weight, unless I stayed on these products for the rest of my life, the weight would return once I quit taking them because my appetite would return.
When we use an external source to control our appetite instead of an internal source, that is our own strength, then we will begin eating again just as before the external control is gone.
In my opinion, for compulsive overeaters, dealing with our addiction, putting a leash on our lion, and locking him in a cage, is the best, most long lasting method of attaining the weight loss we desire.
I am sure there are a considerable number of people who have lost a lot of with with the assistence of Alli, Relacore, Slim Fast, and many many others. They are just not for me.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Low Carb Recipie!!!

Yesterday, my nail lady gave me a recipie, a soup, that sounds wonderful and I just had to share it with you!. It is very low carb, low fat, and low sugar. I haven't made it yet, but I will as soon as I get to the store.
In her words, "It makes a bunch. And you can eat as much as you want."
You begin with 2 cans of Wolfe brand turkey chili, fat free, and 2 cans of chicken broth. Put both on your 'soup pan'. Add a can of tomato sauce, or a can of diced tomoatoes. From this point you can add whatever veggies you like. Mixed vegetables, cabbage, broccoli. They can be canned, fresh, or frozen. Just limit the amount of corn and potatoes you put in your soup, because those vegetables add carbs. Other than that you are free to fix it according to your own taste.
She said it is very filling and tastes wonderful!
I'll let you know my opinion when I get this soup made.

Monday, August 6, 2007

Slippery Things

In previous posts I wrote about "Slippery Places" and "Slippery People". Today I am writing about Slippery Things.
But first, I wish to talk about my grandmother. She is definitely one of my slippery people. Visiting my grandparents, "Mom" and "Pop" as we called them, was one of the joys of my life. I could write a book, just about those visits. We would go and stay for two or three weeks at a time and loved every minute of it. I don't know how they put up with us for that long, but they did.
Food, was never a problem for me there. I ate everything I could for the entire visit. Mom's cooking was always wonderful and she always cooked large quantities. Therefore I always ate large quantities. I had no control over my eating. She always had candy and ice cream. Yep. I couldn't, no didn't, resist those goodies as well.
Pop passed away almost 13 years ago, and Mom is now 96. I go to see her as often as I can and even though she can't cook for me any more, being in control of what I eat is still a big challenge for me. I was with her today; took her to the doctor and then out to eat. I didn't break my diet the entire time I was with her, but it was a major challenge.
Slippery things, for an overeater would be first of all, something we called Trigger Foods in Overeaters Anonymous. These are foods that will trigger a desire to eat more and more when you eat them. You know those foods. "Can't each just one!" More likely, "Can't eat just one bag!"
If you are a recovering compulsive overeater, you know what your trigger foods are, and you know you can never safely those foods again. Ever. They will always be a temptation for you. If you think that you are over your obsession for that food and you can get by with just eating a small amount, then most likely you have lost the battle with that food. Eventually it will get you!

Slippery places, slippery people, slippery things. They will always be in our lives. They will not go away. However, they can be controlled. People are doing it every day and we can too. There is no room for self pity or whining here. Those are not constructive activities and they do not change reality.

Our job it to hold our heads up, be strong and proud. We are living our lives with major challenges. With God's help, we will control our 'lion', our overeating addiction.
As Mom says, "Count your blessings, not your pains!"

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Finding Low Carb Foods While Traveling

I am back home again. Yes, still somewhat in my pink Mary Kay bubble, but gradually getting back into the real world!
Lisa asked me how the dieting went while I was in Dallas, and I replied by saying that it went very well, with a few bites of 'slippage', but nothing I couldn't recover from.
At every meal I ate the things I could and then carried with me peanuts to snack on during the training classes and general sessions, and I really didn't get hungry! Example. For lunch one day we had pastrami slices in a kaiser bun, cole slaw, baked chips, and an ice cream bar for dessert. I ate the pastrami and the cole slaw, and decided to be 'happy'! I was fine until dinner that evening.
I weighed when I returned home and found that I had lost a couple more pounds which bring my total weight lost to about 4 pounds. Yes, that is not much, but I am fine with it.
Even though no one can tell that I have lost any weight at all, my jeans zip up with much less difficulty! Yea!!!
Fact: Every 5 pounds you lose shows more than the 5 pounds before it!

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

So Far, So Good!

This is the end of my second day at Mary Kay Seminar and what a wonderful day it has been! Yes, I am in my "pink bubble" just floating along, enjoying all the training, the excitement, and the friendships of other directors.
It has been fairly easy to eat the right foods today. At breakfast we had fruit, scrambled eggs, bacon, pancakes, and toast. It was served buffet style which enabled me to only take the foods that had no processed carbs and no processed sugar. No pancakes and no toast.
There was really no time for lunch today, but I did snack on peanuts. You know, I have found that when my 'lion', my overeating addiction is under control, then so is my appetite. I just don't get very hungry.
This evening we ate dinner at the hotel restaurant. I had a Texas Caesar Salad with grilled chicken and NO croutons. It tasted wonderful and was very filling.
Tomorrow will be more of a challenge. Seminar officially begins and the meals served will be placed on the tables for us.
I plan on just taking it one meal at a time, eating what I can, and carrying nuts to snack on if I get hungry.
Tomorrow evening, --one meal at a time!

Dieting While Away From Home

It is my first day at Mary Kay Seminar and dieting in the presence of wonderful rich desserts was not too bad. On our drive from Big Spring to Dallas, we stopped at Burger King for lunch and I had a grilled chicken salad. It really was great! I had some peanuts with me in the car and I snacked on those a few at a time if I got hungry during the drive.
We had a Director's Dinner this evening. I ate cheese, cut fresh veggies, pork tenderlion, and, oops, a small helping of a pasta dish. Not too bad. It didn't make me feel like I had completely gone off my diet.
Tomorrow we will have breakfast and I am not anticipating any problems with my dieting plan then.
I'll let you know tomorrow.

Monday, July 30, 2007

Traveling to Dallas

As I mentioned in a previous post, I am a Mary Kay Sales Director. Tomorrow I will be traveling to Dallas for our annual Seminar (convention). It is a wonderful 4 days filled with excitement, motivation, and training. I will be in the company of 12,000-14,000 Mary Kay consultants and directors from all over the country and indeed all over the world. We have a fantastic time!
I am so looking forward to these next few days, but I am also expecting a challenge. You see, there will be 7 meals provided for me during this time, including 2 formal dinners. Yes, Mary Kay Seminar is a 'slippery place' in my life, and Mary Kay ladies are sometimes 'slippery people'. Hmmmmmm. Staying true to my diet plan may indeed be challenging, but right now I feel strong, and I'm making plans for what I can do to remain on the 'straight and narrow' during this time.
I plan on writing short posts to share with you my dietary challenges and victories each day.

Lisa and I are making plans to add a section to this blog which will enable her to share her low carb/no carb food and cooking ideas. She is a very creative cook especially in the area of low carb cooking. I have always been impressed by her abilities in this area. No, she didn't get it from me. Anyway, be looking for low carb cooking tips, recipies and meal ideas in the near future!

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Slippery People

This is the second part of my thoughts on an Alcoholic Anonymous teaching about avoiding Slippery Places, Slippery People, and Slippery Things.

Something that is slippery is different from something that is slick. If you pick up something that is slick or step on something that is slick, you are almost certain to drop it or fall. If you know that it is slick ahead of time, you will probably find a different way of accomplishing your task rather than picking it up or stepping on it.

If you pick up something that is slippery, or step on something that is slippery, there is a chance that you might drop it or fall, but it is not inevitable, if you are cautious. Therefore, if you know ahead of time it is slippery, you might go ahead and carefully do it. That is why slippery is more dangerous that slick.

For a recovering compulsive overeater, slippery people are dangerous. They are your friends. They are fun. They are probably obese. They love to eat and they always have food around. They love you and they love it when you eat with them. Right? Inwardly they will be jealous of you for finally gaining control over your 'addiction lion' called food and they will even admire your strength and 'will power'. However, because of their jealousy, they may try to subtly tempt you into returning to your old ways. They may not do it on purpose, but trust me, they will be glad (even if they don't say so) when you once again join their happy, but miserable overeating clan.

Oh, yes, your addiction may be enough under control that you can be around these people and not overeat. For a while. But little by little, bite, by bite, you will slip, yes, slip back into your old ways. It is almost unavoidable. I am not being pessimistic or negative. I am being realistic.

So what do you do? You can find new friends and never, ever see your old eating buddies again. That is only partially realistic. What if the slippery people in your life are your family? Totally avoid them? Not possible.

I don't think it is realistic to completely change our circle of friends and certainly our family. You just do your best to avoid situations where there are the types of food that will tempt you to overeat. Again. do your best. Personally, it was helpful for me to bring food to family gatherings that I can eat. Taking care of your dietary needs yourself, will give ensure there is food present you can safely eat.

Being aware of the 'slippery' situation you are in, will make you more cautious about you eat. You must have your 'lion' on a short leash and tightly held.

Another Alcoholic Anonymous teaching is about taking one day at a time. I may not be able to do something for the rest of my life, but just for today, I can do it. Remembering back to my Overeaters Anonymous days, there were times when my prayer was not for the day. Instead it was, "Lord, help me make it though this meal." "Lord, help me make it to the next meal." "Lord, help me make it through this church dinner."

Yes, fighting a food addiction is hard, very hard, but God's grace is sufficient, not only for one day at a time, but for one meal at a time.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Well, Maybe My Weight Doesn't Matter, But I Do Care!

A couple of days ago I wrote a post stating that the numbers on the scales are not the top priority when you are seeking to control an overeating addiction. Instead not abusing food is the focus and daily goal of a recovering compulsive overeater.
However, I am here to tell you that I do like to see the numbers on my scales go down. Don't you? You get in the morning, stand on the scales and say, "Yes!", when you see a lower number than the day before! I do!
And what about the days when the scales may show the same weight as the day before, which they will on most days, or oh, dear, the numbers go up by one or two pounds. Does your "Yes!" turn into "Oh, no. This is not good. I am doing my best. I have eaten everything I should and nothing I shouldn't. This is diet is just not working for me. I think I'll eat pizza today, and maybe some dessert as well." If you are one of those people who can't handle a momentary increase or a temporary stabilization in your weight, then Don't Weigh Daily!!!! Do it once a week, or once a month. Not daily. Don't sabotage all your hard work and right eating by just seeing discouraging numbers on your scales.
Lisa, my daughter, has been on this new eating plan for almost a month now and I don't think she has weighed once. She fears that she might be discouraged if she gets in the scales and sees little or no weight loss. Lisa knows she is losing weight by the way her clothes fit and that is good enough for her. Yea, Lisa!!!
For me, however, I like to see the numbers daily. Ok, at least twice daily. Yes, this is coming form the same person who wrote 'It doesn't matter what you weigh." Yes, that is true, but I do care!
I have not told you what my starting weight was. I thought about whether or not to share that gosh awful number with you and decided against it. The main reason? I am too embarrassed. I just can't write that number on this blog and know that all the world is going to see it. I can't do it I will, however, share with you my pounds lost as they gradually come off.
In a few days I may write about my goal and how much I have to lose and then you can do the math!
For today let it be known that, thus far, after my 6th day on the diet, I have lost 3 pounds!!!!! Thank you for your applause!
Have a wonderful day. May God bless you and your family.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Slippery Places

This morning I was watching the news and, of course, one of the lead news stories was the continuing saga of Lindsey Lohan. I feel sadness for her. One of the news anchors said, "She has everything anyone could want, and yet she makes these bad decisions. Sad." The anchor was only partially correct, in my opinion. In some ways she is actually very poor. She is rich in what she doesn't need and has very little of what she does need to live a full and happy life.
Anyway, on this news program Danny Baldwin was brought on to discuss his feelings about Lindsey Lohan and her addictions. He has been through rehab many times with varying degrees of success and failure. At this present time he is apparently staying clean and sober.
As he spoke something he said caught my attention. He was talking about the 12 Step Program and shared that one of the things they learn in this program is to avoid "slippery places", "slippery people", and "slippery things".
That statement spoke volumes to me as a compulsive overeater, and it has been in my thoughts off and on all day.
For those of us who see overeating as an addiction, it is every bit as real as a drinking addiction, gambling addiction or any other kind of addiction. It is an addiction which can be every bit as difficult to overcome as any other addiction. That said, I still believe that we have choices. Yes, we can choose to not eat that 4th brownie or we can choose not to order the large double meat hamburger with extra cheese and fries. Yes, we can choose not to eat those things, but sometimes it is very very hard. Even when we do make the right choices for a season in our lives, staying 'on the wagon' and not ever abusing food again is realistically speaking almost impossible.
When I was a member of Overeaters Anonymous this analogy was used: Think of your addiction as a lion. For an alcoholic, drug addict, gambling addict, or any other kind of addict, you can take your lion, you addiction, lock him in a cage and leave him there. Never take him out again. As a recovering addict can never again take a drink, never again gamble, etc. You must leave the door to the cage closed. Though you may hear the lion roar, as long as he is in the cage, he will not control and destroy your life.
For a compulisve overeater our 'lion' is food. We cannot leave our lion in his cage. We must take our lion for a walk 3 times a day at least. Inevitably there will be times when we get 'scratched'. There will be times when we just eat too much of something. I will write more about that on another day.
A "slippery place" for a recovering alcoholic is a bar or another location where liquor is present. For me, a compulsive overeater, a slippery place is an 'all you can eat' restaurant. I will do just that---eat all I can!!!
Avoiding slippery places is, of course, easier said than done. If, as a compulsive overeater, you find your self in a 'slippery place', where the temptation to over eat is very strong, put a very strong leash on your 'lion' and don't allow yourself to engage in 'slippery eating behavior'.

This is my 6th day on this diet and I have had a great day, excellent energy level, no much hunger, and generally feeling good.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

No Sugar, No Processed Carbs--5th Day

Up to today I had felt just fine. Enough energy. No cravings. No weak feelings. I felt just fine. Until this morning. I got up feeling, well, for lack of a better word, I felt blah!!! I was tired and I just felt heavy. No energy at all. I checked my blood pressure and it was normal, as was my blood sugar. Hmmmmmmm
No, I didn't go and eat a peanut butter sandwich, snack crackers , or any such thing. After 'instant messaging' Lisa, my daughter, I followed her suggestions. I drank some milk, and ate a handful of nuts.
Then I did as my 96 year old grandmother says, "Count your blessings, not your pains." I counted my blessings, put a smile on my face, and went out and worked my Mary Kay business. I got so busy in fact, that I didn't have time to think about how I was feeling. All things considered, it was a very good day!
So my "blah" feelings were really not that important. All I had to do was get busy doing something and quit thinking about them. Then soon, the "blahs" were forgotten in the midst of the busyness of the day.

Monday, July 23, 2007

It Doesn't Matter What I Weigh

It doesn't!?!?!?!??!?
From the perspective of being a compulsive overeater, it doesn't matter what I weigh. The number on the scale is not the most important thing.
For a compulsive overeater who is living in recovery mode, the very most important thing, the top priority is to not abuse food. Not eating compulsively or thoughtlessly. That means, not absentmindedly taking extra bites while cooking, not eating little bits of cake just to even out the jagged cutting line, and not getting a hamburger and fries just to calm nerves or relieve stress. Has anybody beside me ever any of these things?
When we as compulsive overeaters have that raging desire to eat and eat and eat, even when you are not hungry, even when it is embarrassing, even when you know it is unhealthy, under control, then controlling our weight will not be a real issue. The numbers on the bathroom scales will within a healthy weight range! Yes!

More About Carbs

In the diet that we are on, we are not totally avoiding carbs. We are avoiding all processed carbs such as breads, pastas, chips, crackers, etc. We are also avoiding potatoes, corn and other starchy vegetables. We are eating legumes, nuts, and lots of fruits and veggies. We are avoiding foods containing refinded sugar and fruit juices.
Our daughter told me that the first week on the diet she thought she was going to die, because she was so addicted to starches. Since that first week though, she has had lots of energy and felt great!
This is my 4th day on the diet and so far I am doing well. I had a bit of a week moment after lunch today when I went through the cabinet looking for something more to eat. I wasn't hunger, of course! I was just wanting something......
Victory!!! I didn't eat anything, I did what is always the best thing for me to do in that situation----walk out of the kitchen! Yea!!!!

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Is it Bad Carbs vs. Good Carbs? Or is it No Carbs?

About 15 years ago I lost 75 pounds by eating only sugar free, low fat foods. I didn't even think about carbs. I kept the weight off for almost 3 years before gradually gaining it back. :(
When I was diagnosed as diabetic, my doctor recommended a very low carb diet. I wasn't impressed and really had no desire to follow it. So I didn't. However, I did cut back on my sugar intake which was enough to keep my blood sugar under control most of the time. Good enough? Not really because I was still eating too much and gaining weight.
So when Lisa told me about the diet her doctor had put her on and that Adam's doctor had recommended the same type of diet, surprisingly, I was ready to embrace it.
Their doctors recommended a "no processed carb diet". They eat no breads, crackers, rice, pasta, etc. No even the 'low carb' processed starches. They eat meat, dairy, veggies, and fruit. At some time in the future they may add whole grains.
As I begin this same diet, I am reevaluating the things I have previously known and believed about healthy dieting.
Included in this post are some websites about carbs. I suggest that you check them out for yourself and draw your own conclusions.

http://www.goodcarbs.org/#dont_avoid_carb

http://www.wellnesschiro.com/Confused_about_Carbos.htm

This is my 3rd day on this diet and so far, things are going well. However, this morning I did open the door to my pantry and came face to face with a Pringle's can. I quickly decided that whatever I needed in that pantry wasn't important and closed the door. Yea!!!!!!!

When the Family Has Cancer

deborahfoster.wordpress.com

This is the title of my first attempt at blogging. It chronicles the story of both my parents having stage 4 cancer at the same time, a truly horrible time in the life of our family. It was through these devastating experiences, however, that we felt the sweetness of God's presence and experienced His Peace.
Because this blog is emotional and heavy, it is hard to read and is not for everyone. However, please log on and check it out. If you would like to read it on a regular basis you can save it to favorites or register with the feed. Please share this website with others who might enjoy reading it.
Also on my blog I am sharing prayer requests. Please pray for those who are mentioned and feel free to submit to me by email additional prayer requests.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

gain, lose, gain, lose, gain

Maintaining a healthy weight has always been next to impossible for me. It seems that all my life I have been either gaining or losing, never maintaining. Again. Not healthy. I am going to work to make sure that the weight I lose now, stays off. Yes, this is much easier said than done, but I am going to think positively here. Of course, I must do more than think positively and when I am ready to cross that bridge, I know I will do what is necessary to keep from gaining back my weight.

I am an over 50 woman who lives in Texas. I have been a teacher for many years, but am currently a Mary Kay Director. I have a wonderful husband who has been with me and loved me through 'thick and thin'. He is my best friend, and strongest supporter. We have two grown children, a son and a daughter, who continually make us proud. Our daughter is married to 'my favorite son-in-law', a wonderful man who has become solidly part of our family.

I grew up in a family that was compulsive---about food. We did not drink alcohol and it was a good thing. If we had been raised with alcohol, my sisters and I are sure that we would all be alcoholics! Food was our addiction, our drug of choice, our compulsion.

Therefore, I have battled all my life with controlling my desire to eat. For periods of time I would be in control of my appetite and sometimes it was in control of me.

About 15 years ago I joined Overeater's Anonymous. A wonderful decision. It gave me hope. I will be writing more about my time in this organization and the things I learned.

If you know and understand what I mean about eating compulsively, I encourage you to find an Overeaters Anonymous meeting in your area. You can log on to www.oa.org and find local meetings as well as online meetings.

Of course, because dieting is a health issue, please talk to your doctor before beginning any weight loss program.

Today has been a good day for me. It is my 2nd day on this low carb, no processed carb, no sugar diet. I have to be creative with my food, because I have not yet gone to the store and bought appropriate food. So I ate what I have on hand.

It feels good to be winning again, by losing!

Friday, July 20, 2007

Let the Losing and Winning Begin!!!

This blog has been in my mind for a while. I have many motivations for beginning this 'project', many of them (but not all) are selfish, I must admit.
This blog is going to be about weight loss, one of the biggest challenges of my life. I have been through the 'thick' and 'thin' of it several times. Not healthy at all.
Now I have come to the point where losing weight or not losing weight is a life or death matter. I am now type 2 diabetic, have high blood pressure, and my feet hurt all the time. Walking for exercise is extremely painful so I just don't do it.
I have gained so much weight that most of my clothes no longer fit and I refuse to buy new ones. Soooo my 'wearable' wardrobe is very small.
I could go on and on about how being overweight has complicated my life. But I won't. I don't need to. If you have a weight problem, you already know. If you don't have a weight problem, then you probably don't want those complications detailed.
My daughter has inspired me by beginning her own weight loss program. Because of her success and enthusiasm, I have decided to 'follow in her footsteps'.
By writing this blog, I hope to make myself accountable to you, my readers. I plan on sharing with you my success and challenges. Hopefully this will keep me on the 'straight and narrow' path to weight loss victory.
Another purpose for writing this blog is to provide a place of encouragement and hope for readers who might recognize themselves in my words. I want you to be able to share your victories and your challenges. We can all learn from what you have to say. However, I want this blog to have a positive tone. Please no whining! We are going to be strong and proud because we are working to conquer one of the most difficult challenges life has to offer. If you happen to be overweight, you know what I mean.
I will address the reason for the title of this blog more thoroughly in another post, but for the moment, I will just share some basic thoughts. By losing weight I will win better health, more confidence, a larger wardrobe (with smaller sizes!), and more energy among many other things.
I began today with a no sugar, no processed carbs diet. Things went well today! Tomorrow is another day and I have no idea what it will bring. However, I look forward to writing tomorrow evening with a summary of the day.
Tomorrow I will tell you more about myself and my life.